July 1998: Our first appointment with our Reproductive Endocrinologist. We received lots of material on the procedures and medications and we set up a tentative date to do the oocyte retrieval and got busy with the pre-transfer testing:
Sep. 20: Been taking the BCP for 4 days now and Scott & I are both on antibiotics twice daily-- yuck!!!
Sep. 27: Finished doxicycline today -- so happy. My face & neck have been breaking out in reaction to the antibiotics and they have made us both nauseous. We started taking acidolphilus to replenish the friendly flora. We are excited about our upcoming trip to New Orleans. After we get back, we start those lovely injections.
Oct. 5: The first Lupron shot was given abdominally. I wish I could say that I was brave enough to give the shot to myself. It seemed like such a tiny shot and I planned on self-administering the subcutaneous shots, but I wimped out. I couldn't override the wiring in my brain that keeps me from stabbing myself. I think it helps not to watch when getting a shot. Scott was really great with the shots. I was initially on the birth control pill (BCP) to suppress my ovaries and then on Lupron and BCP for 3 days together. The reason for the suppression of the ovaries before the stimulation drugs is to ensure that the medication, not my reproductive system, is controlling my ovaries. The Lupron puts a me in a "menopausal" state. It wasn't bad at all. I had a few hot flashes while I was at work, but they felt a lot like when I blush, so I didn't mind.
Oct. 6-23: Lupron injections. Mostly the shots weren't that bad, occasionally I'd feel itchy around the injection site afterwards or nauseous, but both passed quickly. I did notice that I got a few headaches while I was on Lupron.
Oct. 11: Got my period while on Lupron (supposed to happen).
Oct. 22: Suppression Check --- my ovaries were "quiet" (no action going on) and we obtained our stimulation medications (Fertinex & Repronex).
Oct. 24: Started Fertinex shots in the abdomen in the a.m., Lupron abdominally in the p.m. and Repronex intra-muscular (IM) in the p.m. That first IM shot was SCARY. Scott didn't want to hurt me and I agreed with him. I stood leaning over a little on the couch with my foot turned in (pigeon-toed) while he found the right spot on my hip. I was told to take the weight off the leg attached to the hip where the shot is going -- relaxes the muscle. It wasn't bad at all. The anticipation was MUCH worse.
Oct. 25: Aware of my ovaries today -- felt like something was going on in there. Same shots as yesterday. A little sore after the IM shot.
Oct. 26: Fertinex, Lupron & Repronex.
Oct. 27: Ultrasound to check on follicle growth & blood estrodial test. Got more Fertinex & Repronex. Shots were quick and easy.
Oct. 28: Fertinex, Lupron & Repronex.
Oct. 30: Ultrasound to check follicle growth & blood estrodial test (E2). Taken off Fertinex (because my E2 levels were rising more than needed) and Repronex was upped. We have at least 10 follicles. Since the Repronex was more concentrated (i.e. thicker) Scott had to administer the shot slower.
Oct. 31: Ultrasound to check follicle growth, serum progesterone & blood estrodial test (E2). Given 3 more vials of Repronex.
Nov. 1: Ultrasound to check follicle growth & blood estrodial test (E2). Follicles grew quite a bit. Scott gave me the HCG "trigger shot" tonight so that my body will try to ovulate 40 hours after the shot. My RE will retrieve the eggs before my body ovulates (at 36 hours) on the 3rd.
Nov. 2: No shots today!! ;.)
Nov. 3: Went in early this morning for retrieval. Had an IV (yuck!!). The anesthesiologist put me under (in a twilight state) and my RE, guiding a needle via u/s, aspirated 11 follicles from my ovaries. The whole thing took about 30 min. Scott supplied his sperm sample and took me to his folks where I recuperated. Started the dreaded progesterone in oil IM injections tonight. Not too bad, but a S-L-O-W shot --- 0.5cc progesterone.
Nov. 4: The lab called today for fertilization results:
Nov. 6: Drove up to Scott's work at 9am and took the medications that my RE prescribed: 3 Advil, 1 Darvocet and 1 Valium. My RE recommended transferring only 2 embies since I would be at risk for multiples. The embryologist gave us a picture of our 4 biggest embryos (a 9-cell, 2 8-cells and a 6-cell). So we transferred an 8-cell and a 9-cell. I was wheeled into the OR and the lights were turned out while the RE transferred the embies via the Wallace catheter. The nurse held my hand the entire time. Before I realized it, the whole procedure was over -- I didn't feel a thing. The tech checked the catheter to be sure that both embies were cleared, and then I was wheeled back out to Scott. I took a 2 hour nap with my knees up and then my hubby took me home to rest on the couch/bed for 3 days!!! My back ached and my ovaries were still swollen from the retrieval. Second night of 1cc progesterone.
Nov. 7: Laid on the couch all day. Had a major headache with a sharp pain behind my left eye. The nurse said I could take Tylenol. The institute froze our remaining embryos for our future use. I have been paranoid about dislodging those embryos.. . .every time I have to pee I worry. Now, we wait until we can test 11 days past transfer (dpt).
Nov. 17: Even though I'd been having pregnancy signs in the past few days, I didn't dare to believe because it very well could've been the progesterone. I drove up to the institute and took a blood test and also a progesterone test. I drove to Scott's office to await results. I was already planning on round #2. Finally they called and said I was pregnant. Part of me was ecstatic and I cried when I broke the news to the family, but part of me was still cautious. There was still a 2% chance that this could be a tubal pregnancy. Because there was a shortage of progesterone in oil, I had to order the it from a mail-order company.
Nov. 20: Back for another HCG test to ensure that the levels are doubling every 2-3 days like they should. Everything checked out fine. I asked about twins and the nurse said that with the initial low levels (in the 50s), they didn't expect twins, but you never know.
Nov. 25: HCG & blood tests. . .everything fine.
Nov. 28: I've been VERY tired and my hips are really tender from the nightly shots. Neither side has enough time to heal up before it gets another shot. I use a heating pad and have Scott rub my hips to get the knots out. I've had a little cramping, but from what I've heard, the progesterone make my uterus do that. I'm anxious to get past the first trimester---trying to take it one day at a time.
Dec. 5: 4 1/2 weeks along. I'm feeling fine and trying to get enough nutrition and sleep. I go in Tuesday for the ultrasound. The twinges in my abdomen could be the round ligaments stretching.
Dec. 8: Went in for u/s today. Saw 1 sac with a faint heartbeat. We were so EXCITED to see our baby. After our initial elation, we were brought into our RE's office where he told us that was concerned about this pregnancy. He just wanted to be up front with his concern and said our baby may make it. We left that appointment feeling a little void of emotion. Later that night, I searched and found a website that really helped me with my questions, INCIID. This is a wonderful sight for those experiencing infertility and other issues related to pregnancy and loss. I posted a question about the odds of my baby making it and found new hope from some other ladies on the bulletin board.
Dec. 15: Went in for 2nd u/s today. While we saw a heartbeat, it wasn't a great heartbeat; our RE gave our baby a 25% chance of making it. At first I was calm and we discussed giving it a week to see if the baby grew or the heartbeat got stronger. We were given the option to stop the progesterone and see what happens or continue. We opted to continue. I couldn't bear the thought of giving up so soon or contributing to the demise of our baby. When we left, I became very distraught . . . . everything was supposed to be okay now that the baby was where it was supposed to be. I remained calm until we got to the elevator, then the tears started flowing. I hadn't given up, but I was in shock to hear this disheartening news. I tried to hide my emotions when I got back to work, but a co-worker asked if I was ok, and my face contorted with the pain I was feeling.
Dec. 18: Been a long couple of days. Since Wed I have been feeling queasy every day. I've had those cramps also, like a chilly feeling in my abdomen. Still feeling pregnant. Also feeling like I was beginning to get a cold or the flu. I had a slight temperature and my eyes hurt. Left work at 2pm and slept on the couch all afternoon. Drank plenty of fluids. Really nervous about our next u/s. Still doing the progesterone injections and praying.
Dec. 22: Our 3rd u/s. The doctor said our baby is still measuring 6 weeks 1 day, now 2 weeks behind. He said he was 100% sure that our baby wasn't going to make it and that only a miracle would do it. He didn't even look for a heartbeat. He apologized for the bad holiday news and asked that we stop the progesterone injections and wait to miscarry. He said he didn't recommend a D&C to remove the baby, that my body would take care of it naturally. The doc said it could take up to a month for the miscarriage to take place. Even with this news I was still trying to remain hopeful and take care of myself. We stopped the progesterone, but I continued to take baby aspirin and eating well. Posted messages to the Dr. who moderates the Miscarriage Bulletin board in hopes of some professional advice.
Dec. 27: Still maintaining a pregnancy diet just in case. Had a really great holiday with the family despite the bad news. Dr. on the miscarriage board said I should get a second opinion, so I scheduled an appt with my regular OB to do an u/s.
Dec. 29: U/s at my OB's office today revealed a perfectly round marble sized sac that was pulling away from the uterine wall. No visible fetus at this point. I could argue that my OB's u/s machine isn't as hi-tech as my RE's u/s, but nonetheless, miscarriage was impending. Hate that feeling, waiting to miscarry. I asked my OB what I could expect and she said that it will be quite painful for a few minutes as my cervix dilated and I passed the tissue, but given my history of tubal pregnancies, I will be able to take the pain in stride. She offered to follow up with weekly u/s; I told her I'd call her if I needed that.
Jan. 1: We drove to Dallas to attend the 1st playoff game (Cowboys practically handed over the victory to the Cardinals!). That Saturday I had a tiny bit of spotting (pink). I was getting nervous because of what I'd heard from other ladies on the m/c bulletin board about natural miscarriage. Most recommended that I get a D&C, but I didn't want to go that route. I had pain pills left over from the retrieval just in case. I was also scared that in the middle of the playoff game (where it was freezing cold!) I would miscarry in the bathroom. That didn't happen.
Jan. 3: Bled a little bright red today and waited for the pain to begin. Not yet.
Jan. 4: At about 9pm I started cramping and bleeding heavily. I immediately took a pain pill. I soaked 5 pads through the night. I was up at 2am, 4am, 5am, 6am and 7am changing pads and clothes. It was kinda scary how much blood I lost. And each time I changed pads, I passed thick clots of tissue. Not real painful, but I think the 2nd pain pill really helped out there. I still hadn't passed the gestational sac. At 7am I felt fine enough to go to work. . . .
Jan. 5: I was at work for about 45 minutes and was just about to eat my breakfast when I started feeling faint - just like I felt with my tubal pregnancies. I went to the bathroom to pass more blood and tissue and I tried not to faint. Scott brought me home and made me some soup. I laid there waiting for the pain pill to kick in. About an hour later I passed the sac and the bleeding tapered off. My fifth Angel.
My RE said that we had to wait 2-3 cycles before we could try a frozen embryo transfer, so that's what we're doing right now: waiting and praying. We will probably run some tests to make sure that we're covering the bases with my infertility.